[review]
The Australian soap star turned pop sensation has been whisking up public affection through her recent televisual incarnation as bubbly judge and coach on the BBC’s The Voice, just in time for the release of her latest album (which came out on the 14th March). Her ability to sexily writhe about on a piano/exercise ball/other miscellaneous surface remains unrivalled, and after seeing her perform Into the Blue with her two mentees on The Voice semi-final (in which she managed to look about 18 despite being well into her forties), I decided to give her album a listen.
Into the Blue is suitably poppy. You won’t be able to get it out of your head (geddit?)
Million Miles is the perfect song to be playing in an exercise class, with lyrics like ‘my heart’s beating to this drum’, alongside an energetic beat to keep you in time. There’s a slightly synthetic feel to the vocals which continues throughout the album.
I Was Gonna Cancel doesn’t beat about the bush – it’s a motivational song designed to get you up out of bed and to ‘go girl!’ Set to funky synths, it’ll make you feel good about yourself. Even Kylie has trouble getting out of bed sometimes!
Sexy Love (yawn at the title) incorporates some very sexy maracas but in the end is just your run of the mill stereotypical pop.
Sure enough the next song is called Sexercise. Slightly slower paced and with some unashamedly rhythmic and dirty bass, this song is a weird mix between an exercise class and music to have sex to. I haven’t personally tried it out (yet? You’d need a willing partner with a sense of humour!) but I think it could get awkward if you paid too much attention to the lyrics (‘feel the burn’ ‘lemme see you bounce bounce bounce’).
The next song, Feels So Good, provides you with the perfect soundtrack to your post coital high. Going back to a faster beat you can now return to your running machine and pick up the pace after the slow grind of Sexercise, accompanied by cheery whistles and smiling away.
If Only feels like quite a big song. It’s uplifting, it’s inspiring, and the pace is more subtly kept by a clap track. There’s a sense of longing – we’re close to the end now!
I misread the next track’s title (Les Sex) as the man’s name ‘Les’, which led me to bemusedly expect something slightly different than the sexy french vibe intended. I was also slightly confused by the fact that the blatant wobbing on this track was interspersed with the horribly grating sound my laptop makes when it crashes – I could probably do with Les to come round and fix it for me.
I didn’t find too much to say about the title track Kiss Me Once. It didn’t excite me but I didn’t hate it either.
On Beautiful, Kylie is accompanied by Enrique Inglesias (much sexier than good old Les Sex). This is probably my favourite track on the album, as for a few seconds we hear a glimmer of the Kylie who can really sing (the Kylie we hear on Nick Cave’s Where the Wild Roses Grow). Her breathy crooning is brought out by Enrique’s vocals – perhaps a duet with a male voice is where she really shines? However, later on the song becomes something from a Disney montage scene as Enrique Iglesias is replaced by a robot version of himself and the leaping about, autotuned Kylie is back.
The final track on the album, Fine, is in the same vein as I Was Gonna Cancel. It is motivational, and leaves you uplifted at the end of the album with the knowledge that ‘you’re gonna be fine’.
My verdict of the album as a whole: It’s an album to exercise to, but otherwise it’s not overly exciting. I’d put it on if I had some washing up to do, and wanted to feel glamorous and empowered while I did it. The timing of its release was bang on – the sun is shining and people will be doing their spring cleaning to bouncy pop.
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